The Dream Theater mess

Summary

This is a story I’d almost rather forget, but a lot of people ask about it and over time I’ve found it simpler to just refer to this document instead of typing some cryptic remarks back in email.

Musical Scares

Actually the real background is a fax program I had just installed on my brand-spanking new 486/50. It had the ability traverse a database of fax numbers and send the same fax to each, with a few variable fields. I know, this is lame stuff nowadays but I figured I’d make a stab at this “proto-spam”. *

So I put together a fax with a resume and a cheesy little picture, and then I diligently entered a bunch of fax numbers into the program. I got the numbers from “the Billboard Personal Manager’s Guide” – the numbers were to management companies all over the world that I thought looked interesting.

Most of the replies I got were of the nature “thanks, we put it on file, we’ll call you if the need arises”. Some time later, Jim Pitulski from Roundtable (this was Dream Theater’s management company at the time) called me up.

First, he actually suspiciously asked me if “I’d heard anything!?” I didn’t have the heart to tell him the fax to Roundtable was just one out of 300 or so!!

He explained the situation – Dream Theater’s keyboard player Kevin Moore was leaving, and of course the band would need a replacement. I said I’d think about it. I was also sworn to secrecy, because the label was extremely jittery – understandable, since being slapped with having a founding member leave just before a release is less than ideal from a marketing/publicity standpoint.

Although this was a band I quite liked at the time, I really had some doubts this would work out, mainly because I’d discovered how much I loved more improvisatory music. I’d been doing a bunch of stuff with Jonas, including many live gigs with not much predetermined musical structure, which is a lot of fun – it was usually loose and relaxed, but not in some “hippie” sense, perhaps a odd-meter riff and a chord sequence as a basis but with really long improvised stretches, and arrangements changing a lot from night to night. This is sort of the style of music that ended up on the “E” record. I’d rediscovered my love for the Hammond organ... we did many small tours that leaned heavily toward the German “Kulturzentrum” circuit and smaller rock clubs.. there was good cameraderie, a small tight crew, low overhead, weird music. Jonas is a bizarre cat, and I somehow felt like I was learning something. What more can you ask for?

So I felt a little bit wary about going back in a more corporate direction. Playing a lot of pre-written parts and being critizised for “not playing the same solo as on the CD”, was right up there with going to the Alien dentist on my wish list at the time. Such was my twisted logic anyway, when trying to think of reasons not to do this and stick with my original plans for the fall.

I mulled it over for a few weeks, mentioned it to a few friends, and they sort of talked me into it. I can still remember Jörgen Holmstedt’s words: “This would be PERFECT for you!!” Yeah right, Jörgen!! So. At the time, after my initial reluctance, I figured that, fuck, if they’d have me, I’d give it a shot. It’s a great band and a great opportunity to make some interesting music. And there would probably be a fair amount of cash in it as well!! Maybe I could curtail my desire to improvise for the greater good. I was excited about the future prospect of writing stuff, because of course the guys in the band are all excellent players.

So I called Jim up and said “I’ll do it!!” I would move some of my other appointments around. As fas as I can remember, it was nothing heavy anyway. I had planned to go to Sweden to edit and master Ten Seasons and also to write and do basic tracking for what later became Heavy Machinery and Sonic Winter. Jim was happy – his problem was now ostensibly solved.

The guys in the band were still on some promo tour and weren’t in town, but they’d be back in a week and a half. The only pressing matter was some gig in LA that I had to do. Then we could relax for a few weeks, play and see if there any major personality conflicts developed. (“Personality conflicts” is a music industry euphemism for “fist fights over economic issues such as salaries, retainers and royalty splits” – sort of like “musical differences” but a tad more blunt.)

So down I went to Roundtable, talked about the financial things with the two managers, shook hands on the deal to do at least the show in LA, and got copies of some of the material that I was missing. I then went home and started to learn to play the songs. All the songs! I don’t read music that well, so I have to memorize it. A bit over-ambitious of me in retrospect, especially to memorize all of that Images and Words CD*, but I figured it wasn’t a total waste of time, because at the time I really thought I was guaranteed the spot in the band, well, ahem, at least for the tour, anyway. Just rote note learning, it’s not that complicated stuff mentally!!

To make a long story a good bit longer, a few days later I called Jim, in regards to shipping some of my gear I think. Jim called back; No, they wouldn’t pay for shipping any gear after all, now there were two keyboardists “running” for the spot, the other being Jordan Rudess, whom Kevin also had recommended as a possible replacement, based on his playing on a Vinnie Moore record in the late 80s. (Can’t remember the title, but it was on Squawk, some Mercury subsidiary.. ?) Jim assured me that despite this little snag, it was extremely probable that I would do the tour. The date for meeting and playing with the guys would be the same, but now it was in the shape of an “Audition” – somewhat of a formality, according to Jim.

Now comes the weird part.

This was a few weeks before Awake was to be released, and I suspect people at East/West were nervous about the keyboard situation, so someone from the label indulged in some wishful thinking and released the “news” that I was already in the band to the media.

This included the internet, as somebody had been hired to pose as a “Joe Average” and post favorable stuff about East/West acts and generally be an information age publicity tool.

That fucking idiot’s press releases and internet post (the guy didn’t even spell my name right!) is actually how any of you bastards know this crap went down at all!

Also, this is how the news that Kevin had left was sprung on the congregation of Insane Typing Monkeys known as Usenet readers. You have to remember, this was 1994, “the year that September never ended”. I hadn’t had my internet account for that long, so I was still a bit of a newbie. I’d subscribed to the “Ytsejam” list for fun – I think this was in the days it was on the arastar server. Lots of Dream Theater fans knew my email address. I was flooded with mail! Mostly congratulating me, but some also explaining to me that I sucked and that I could never replace Kevin!! This was the progenitor of that same, lame fucking debate that seems to consume some Dream Theater fans wherever they continue to congregate online after they crawl out from under some rock! Anyway, it pissed me off! Especially since now I knew, that the gig was not 100% guaranteed!

Well, I kept plugging away at the material for a few more days. It’s not really technically or even conceptually difficult material, simply more of a problem to memorize and absorb. Kevin came by one afternoon to clarify some of the parts that were a bit muddy in the mix – I’d made a list of them which we basically went down and checked off. I of course asked him why he was leaving but he didn’t give a very specific answer, AFAIR. I remember asking him what he thought the odds of me actually doing this was.. his reply was “you’ve got nothing at all to worry about”..

The day of the meeting, one of the roadies was supposed to pick me up, but he flaked somehow and I had to grab a taxi with all my gear (lots of heavy analog stuff! I remember even hauling down my Matrix-12 there) so I was a bit late. But the “audition” went good. We did instrumental versions because LaBrie had a sore throat or something. (Hey, don’t singers always have a sore throat ?) It was interesting and fun anyway! Either I was strung out on caffeine, or they play the songs a little bit slower in real life. Because I was late we only played about 40 minutes or so (that’s three Dream Theater songs!). I exchanged maybe 4-5 minutes of banter with John M. and Mike P. while I packed up my shit up. I remember asking why Kevin left. They claimed having no idea ISTR. Probably the wrong question to ask, but of course I was curious, for obvious reasons!! Then I took a cab back home.

They were going to have a band meeting about the issue, so later that night I called Jim at Roundtable to ask what the deal was, and he explained to me what you already know if you read this far – “the guys had decided to go with Jordan” for the LA gig, not as a member but in a “side man” capacity. I was of course really sad and pissed off, quite a change from my initial doubts. It’s weird how the human mind works! *

Moreover, he told me that Jordan was not going to be the permanent replacement either. I got the impression they felt his image was a bit too far off as well.. The band had not been able to make their mind up at all, they had decided to “keep looking”, as he put it. He wanted to know if he could consider the “door open”. In my upset state of mind, I told him something like “if you guys ever even call me back, expect to pony up a substantial amount of cash...” I posted a message on ytsejam briefly describing what happened. Then I left for Sweden a few days later.

Later I heard they they held another audition. This time is was a battle between the illustrious Louie Mastro and Derek Sherinian, neither whom I had ever heard of at the time. Louie, a friend that knew him informed me, was “the biggest possible moron, squared”. I’m still bemused as to the reason that they even considered him. It’s really quite inexplicable. Of course, again, the rest is known to anyone that’s bothered to read this far, except maybe Louie’s story. Louie was a strange cat... he was very active online, sometimes setting up dates with some innocent woman (he was married as well at the time), presenting himself as “the keyboard player of Dream Theater”. He was also pretty active in the AOL Dream Theater forum and I heard he even slagged me (hey, of all people!! ) a few times. With hindsight that was to be expected: I subsequently met him, he was a pretty disturbed individual in person as well. Sadly, he killed himself some time later. This sounds horrible to say, but in all honesty, I thought his playing and writing was awful. Terrible. Well, hope you rest in peace, Louie. And I really mean that..

Later again, I became good friends with Jim Pitulski. He would tell me some of the gossip. It apparently took the band half a year of touring to decide that Derek was officially in the band! I still wonder sometimes how they resolved all the economic issues. The band and the “other” manager (Rob Shore) later decided to part ways with Jim, and an extremely nasty and protracted lawsuit resulted. Any which way, I just know that for me, maybe things worked out the best way. I think I would have been a bit too crazy for that particular band..

So, the question “what happened” had a very complex answer. I don’t really know it, but that was the whole story, from my perspective anyway.. Pretty strange how these things happen, huh!? I hope this doesn’t come off as hostile toward the band or anything, I really have no problem at all with any of the guys... I still love the music they do and they’re all decent people as well..

At the time, some of you were kind enough to supply rumours and/or your own suggestions via email. Some of the better ones:

• I got drunk and started harassing members of the band at a gig.
Persistent rumour.. The source of this is one bootleg video tape, which a friend graciously sent me a copy of, which shows me slightly tipsy # drunk off my ass!! backstage at the Limelight (New York) being interviewed after a Dream Theater show on the Images and Words tour...

• Showed up drunk at the audition.
I should have! What is it with you people!? I don’t really drink that much..

• I didn’t go to Berkeley.
(True, fundamental physics has always interested me, though)

• I didn’t go to Berklee.
(Also true)

• I slept with some of the band member’s wives / boyfriends / male pets.
(Don’t know if I should dignify this with a comment!? Something like “male dogs, you think I’m some sort of pervert!?”)

Update!

But of course, if you bothered to read this far, maybe you know what happened even later! Some of the Dream Theater guys did two instrumental records (LTE) together with Jordan R. (who by the way has a home page at http://www.mediusvision.com/jordan/ – and also by the way while I remember, the Vinnie Moore record mentioned above is called “Time Odyssey”). So, while Derek took Jordan’s place in 1994, in 1999 Jordan took Derek’s place! Freaky!!

The Eminent Mr Sherinian has since embarked on a solo career. I haven’t heard the stuff (Planet X) yet, but I really liked the Platypus record and I can recommend it. He seems to have a web page now as well, by the way. It’s at http://www.dereksherinian.com.