Celebrity Rate-A-Video

The members of Dream Theater claim their influences range from progressive rock like Rush and Yes to heavy stuff like Metallica and The Red Hot Chili Peppers. Keep this in mind as drummer Mike Portnoy and keyboardist Kevin Moore sit through the widest range of videos we could dig up for them.

Pride And Joy, Coverdale/Page

Mike: I could tell you already I like the automated mixing board effect.

Kevin: They're keeping it quite exciting for a live-in-the-studio video.

Mike: I like the song a lot. It's the way it should be, Whitesnake meets Zeppelin. I think they accomplished their goal.

Down On Me, Jackyl

Kevin: Could you just write Mike laughed at the opening riff...

Mike: I'm sorry, but I have trouble taking these guys seriously. They are trying to be serious in this video and it's not working. They will forever be remembered as lumberjacks.

Kevin: I do like this song better though. The stage idea with the parental advisory sticker is cool. And his hair is really fluffy.

Mike: The concept is pretty cool. It's a very early '80s video. It looks like something Twisted Sister would have done.

Kevin: But does the song have anything to do with the theme of the video? That is the question.

Leave It Alone, Living Colour

Mike: Just for the record, I love this band. We went to school with their drummer, Will Calhoun.

Kevin: This song is cool. The video has a nice look to it, I like all the colors, it's very liquid.

Mike: The only thing that bugs me is the drummer is playing straight two/four throughout the entire song and it's a bit too straight for me. Even on Cult Of Personality which was very straight-ahead, he had these great fills.

Kevin: Yeah, it's quite annoying. They are really good musicians.

Intruder, M.O.D.

Mike: I really can't say anything bad 'cause I know Billy Milano and he'll kick my ass. the music is much more raw and hardcore, more hardcore than any other of the M.O.D. albums which were more thrashy.

Kevin: I don't know if it's the video deck, but it's kinda hard to get through the production. I wouldn't say I don't like it though...

These Freaks Are Here To Party, Infectious Grooves

Mike: I just bought this CD. It's cool, it's fun, it's zany just like the band itself. And did I mention funky?

Kevin: The video definitely reflects the style of the band. It's an exciting video to watch 'cause it's not repetitive.

Pound For Pound, Pro-Pain

Mike: These guys are our buddies.

Kevin: I'm really proud of these guys 'cause they did a really great album. I like the rap kinda groove on the drums upon the heavier thrasher style of the vocals.

Mike: I'd just like to say that Gary and Slate are my homeboys and I'll gladly masturbate to anything they put out.

Are You Gonna Go My Way, Lenny Kravitz

Mike: Excellent! I just picked this up today.

Kevin: I think this is the best pseudo-looking performance video I've seen In a long time. There's a lot of space, everyone is grooving and having a good time. But I wanna know if these people paid extras 'cause they are all wearing the same '60s type clothing.

Mike: I agree with Kevin, this is a really great video, and the bass player looks like Noel Redding from Jimi Hendrix's old band. Lenny Kravitz is another person I always loved 'cause he's like a cross between the Beatles and Hendrix-acid-rock sort of thing.

Ordinary World, Duran Duran

Mike: I swear to God I just picked this one up today too. I wanted it because Zappa's old guitarist is in the band now, but I'm embarrassed to say I love this song. And they always had really great videos. I hate to admit it but I always liked them.

Kevin: The song doesn't do anything for me... the production is obviously very good.

Mike: You're gonna hear this song for months and it'll grow on you. Trust me. The melody and the progression are far too good.

Cover My Eyes, Marillion

Mike: Thank you for showing this to us. I never saw this before.

Kevin: I never understood why these guys never made it here, at least in the pop genre. The song is catchy, has a nice build to it. The video is kinda busy though, but it doesn't matter. The song is great.

Mike: There's not enough of the other band members. We've always been big Marillion fans, the old stuff, the new stuff.

The Three Pigs, Green Jello

Mike: These guys were in the studio when we shot MTV's Headbangers Ball and one of them had three foot boots on. This is good, the video reminds me of old Primus videos. But the song sounds like a bad King Diamond impression. But it's funny. They are the best thing since Gwar.

Kevin: I hate the song, but the video is very funny. Very entertaining.